Astronomy professor: Please explain the big bang theory.
Me:
Astronomy professor:
Me:
Astronomy professor:
Me:
Astronomy professor:
Me:
Astronomy professor:
Me: Our whole universe was in a hot dense state, then nearly fourteen billion years ago expansion started. Wait... the Earth began to cool, the autotrophs began to drool, Neanderthals developed tools, we built a wall, we built the pyramids!! Math, science, history, unraveling the mysteries, that all started with the big bang! HEY!

lol seriously

lol seriously shut up mom. Don’t yell at me for having laxatives in my purse, I took them from my friend so she wouldn’t use them just to be skinny.

#thinkbeforeyouyell

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7oclock-am:

Shit got realll

(Source: invierno, via a-l-w-a-y-smyslef)